Why does everyone my age look so old lately?
Is it a coincidence that bananas are always 69 cents/lb?
Does my mailman think I’m smart because I get The Atlantic?
Does my mailman think I’m hot because I get Women’s Health?
Why do I care so much what my mailman thinks?
Will I ever stop caring about what other people think?
Am I the only one who judges porn by the set design?
Did Steve Jobs have any regrets?
Is there anyone out there who cares less than me about whether or not Ashton and Demi are breaking up (hint: I don’t care at all)?
Why doesn’t anyone ever talk about how Ghandi’s nose was so big?
Was Ghandi ever an insecure teenager who cared about his nose being big?
Are vending machines agist because they only take crisp, young bills?
Should I be occupying something?
When can we go back to the barter system?
Will I ever get over the fact that it’s already 2011?
I mean, wasn’t it JUST Y2K?
What should I do with my life (taking suggestions)?
Have you seen my new column?
Why do I feel so bad for MySpace?
How did Michael Jackson name his son Blanket?
Why do my jeans always smell weird?
One time I cracked an egg to make a cake and there was a dead chicken fetus inside.
Why did I throw that one in there when it’s not a question?
Am I out of questions?
Am I out of answers?
Am I out of steam?