October 6, 2011

It really does take up the majority of his face.

Why does everyone my age look so old lately?

Is it a coincidence that bananas are always 69 cents/lb?

Does my mailman think I’m smart because I get The Atlantic?

Does my mailman think I’m hot because I get Women’s Health?

Why do I care so much what my mailman thinks?

Will I ever stop caring about what other people think?

Am I the only one who judges porn by the set design?

Did Steve Jobs have any regrets?

Is there anyone out there who cares less than me about whether or not Ashton and Demi are breaking up (hint: I don’t care at all)?

Why doesn’t anyone ever talk about how Ghandi’s nose was so big?

Was Ghandi ever an insecure teenager who cared about his nose being big?

Are vending machines agist because they only take crisp, young bills?

Should I be occupying something?

When can we go back to the barter system?

Will I ever get over the fact that it’s already 2011?

I mean, wasn’t it JUST Y2K?

What should I do with my life (taking suggestions)?

Have you seen my new column?

Why do I feel so bad for MySpace?

How did Michael Jackson name his son Blanket?

Why do my jeans always smell weird?

One time I cracked an egg to make a cake and there was a dead chicken fetus inside.

Why did I throw that one in there when it’s not a question?

Am I out of questions?

Am I out of answers?

Am I out of steam?




Why are you reading these? You should go buy some bananas. They are 69 cents/lb.
Or maybe just read some more questions here and here.


Simone October 6, 2011 at 10:34 am

anyone who has ever been a teenager has suffered from insecurities. if it’s not the nose it’s the boobs, if it’s not the boobs it’s the thighs, if it’s not the thighs it’s the addiction to pcp, if it’s not the addiction to pcp it’s the poor grades, if it’s not the poor grades it’s the utter lack of fitting in with any of the annoying cliques especially the cheerleaders and jocks, if it’s not the not fitting in with any cliques it’s the smelly jeans your mom buys you at the cheap discount store…

Karina October 6, 2011 at 11:01 am

ewww… i remember the egg incident…

Rahul October 6, 2011 at 2:22 pm

A wise man once said, “If you haven’t lived with any regrets then you haven’t lived at all.” Ok, that guy was Billy Joel and I’m not sure what he got on his SAT to qualify him as wise, but I like that quote.

Vending machines could also be West Hollywood with that definition. What? WE WERE ALL THINKING IT.

laurenne October 7, 2011 at 12:44 am

All vending machines are gay. Heard it here first.

madgew October 6, 2011 at 3:53 pm

Laurenne, how do you think up all this shit? I love how you mind works when it gets on these lists. I can’t wait to meet your mother who friended me on FB.

ac neil October 6, 2011 at 6:52 pm

if we say, “do bears shit in the woods?” what do the bears say??

The Incredible Woody October 6, 2011 at 8:13 pm

Why do my neighbors have 27 dogs? Seriously. 27.

Mary October 13, 2011 at 11:16 am

Hey! I don’t look old!!!

Do I???

Genie October 14, 2011 at 5:13 am

Here’s a suggestion of what you should do with your life:
Generously take up on offer by a friend to be in her wedding all the way in Australia and decide you can’t go to Australia without going to Papua New Guinea, and you can’t go there without going to Japan and you can’t go there without going to Vietnam thus deciding to quit your job and travel for a year.

Brooke Farmer October 26, 2011 at 10:58 pm

I didn’t even know Ashton and Demi were breaking up.

And I don’t care at all.

I think me not knowing trumps your not caring.

Do I win something for that?

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