I went to the zoo!
Is it weird that I just want to be tickled by an elephant’s trunk? Next birthday, I would please like one elephant tickling. Unless this is a weird fetish I haven’t heard of and it requires I wear crotchless panties and mauve body paint. Then forget it.
Elephant butts are funny too. This guy has a spot of poo on his butt. He doesn’t seem to care. I want to be just like elephants. You can learn a lot from their nonchalance.
Haha! Turtles are such exhibitionists. Hey wait… do you smell something? Oh, that’s poo on my butt. Being just like elephants is not working out.
I learned that gibbons and cranes are monogamous. This made me wonder if gibbons and cranes also argue over when to have sex and complain about their in-laws.
Aw shit. Glen wants to have sex. What should I tell him? Shitshitshit. Um… Glen, I ‘ve got too much on my mind…and I’m not feeling sexy at all…didn’t shave.
If Leonard’s mother comments on my feathers one more time, I’m walking out.(alt: I’m flying out. Not sure if cranes fly. I should look that up.)
I wish we all had skin like giraffes so that nobody would be either black or white. But then we’d all be the same, so that would be boring. Forget I said anything.