730am Wake up to the same cute voice talking about the same trucks. Man, kids get up early.
8am Smile and nod as my entire family laughs at my Malaysian moo-moo. It’s comfy!
11am Head to tailgate party for UT game. Against my will. Refrain from making jokes about UT also meaning Urinary Tract.
12pm See several cowboy boots, confederate flags and CHAPS!
1pm Eat pizza, three scones from Starbucks, and kettle corn– true American goodies. Love every bite but yearn for a samosa.
2pm See cheerleaders and chuckle. Remember the time when I too was a leader of cheers and truly thought the game would not go on without me and my pep. Ah, hindsight.
4pm Observe Texas traditions like the unveiling of a humongous Texas flag and the hailing of Texas as its own nation.
4:15pm Cheer as the players emerge. Marvel as they bend onto one knee and pray before fans who are yelling, ‘Make them eat shit.’ Wonder what part of the bible that’s in.
7pm Listen to my cousins gloat. Yeah yeah Texas is the best. Whatever.