I realized yesterday that Thanksgiving is quite an American holiday. We’re already known for overeating, and on this special day we get together so we can overeat in front of people. It’s just like every other day for me, but I normally overeat burritos.
After the strangely delicious Tofurkey last night, I rushed to Target at midnight to get a flatscreen TV at a discount. No I didn’t. But I guess other people did. Other people camped out in front of Best Buy for days. Nothing like being the first one to buy electronics from a tired man in a blue polo shirt. Are the discounts really that spectacular?
Violence around the country? A woman pepper spraying people in line? To get fifty bucks off? This is why people in other countries hate us, my people! We’re obsessed with more more more more more more more (and they also hate our loose morals).
I am sitting in a cafe watching the world go by and steering clear of any type of store. I hate stores, which is why I still have the style of a clubgoer from 1998. I haven’t gone shopping since then. Shopping is a torture for me. Stores are chock full of decisions, and there’s nothing worse than decisions. I’ll just sit here and contemplate…
What do Indians do on Thanksgiving?
Why didn’t they drop the name ‘Indians’ the moment they realized they weren’t in India?
How do Indians from India feel about Native Americans having their name for so long?
Do Native Americans enjoy black friday?
Has any store ever offered to open their doors early ONLY for Native Americans?
Why is butter so fucking good?
What am I doing with my life?
Happy Black Friday!
{ 13 comments }
Oh Laurenne I want to give you the gift of not thinking for one whole day. It is so hard to do and believe me I have tried. You are always on your game and thinking is your fame. I love you and hope you had an amazing day yesterday and today. I have barely left my pajamas. Watching junky TV and enjoying leftovers.
No thinking? Don’t THINK so.
HA!
Get it?
Don’t think so?
I went out black friday shopping, and I never saw such miserable staff…except for the ladies at Bath and Body Works who always seem stuck on annoyingly perky…must be the Sweet Pea. And yay for Tofurkey roasts!
Man, that place always smells so good. And then I buy those room deodorizers. And then I get them home. And then I get a stomach ache from that fakey smell. What’s in that stuff?
I’m thankful you’re my people.
wait. I thought YOU were MY people. Let’s discuss.
We have the same here on Boxing Day (day after xmas). Stores open at 4am. People camp outside of them. They go mental – and why? I have no idea. There’s nothing I hate more than being in a cramped messy space with other people. Yet other people thrive on it.
So they can buy all the stuff they wanted for Xmas, but didn’t get because they could buy it after Xmas with a third off.
They win. They’re cheating the system. Except, it’s the system who open at 4am Boxing Day.
Oooh get me. Climbs down off soap-box…
Shopping on the day after Christmas sounds even MORE horrible! All those returns as well. I want to hide just thinking about it. Still, boxing day sounds way cooler.
My ex boyfriend once took my son to camp out in front of Best Buy for a flat screen TV. They had a blast. And yes, the deals are that good, but there are only a few of each item that is on a mega sale. With is why people camp out like that.
There is just nothing I want badly enough to do it myself.
Also, I have no money.
This year is the first time I’ve heard of Black Friday – I’m not sure how I’ve managed to get to aged 30 without knowing about it.
I guess this is not a bad thing however.
I just tried to think of something that I want so desperately, that I would camp outside a shop for.
All I came up with was a unicorn.
I also might wait in line for a unicorn. Only if it could talk though.
“How do Indians from India feel about Native Americans having their name for so long? ”
I think it’s absolute poppycock. Why do Native Americans always have to steal from India? They stole the name, the food (rice), the skin color. THIS IS AN OUTRAGE. Someone get me Pocohontas or those other ones so I can voice my concerns.
I rode my bike past the Best Buy a few blocks from my house on Thanksgiving day around noon. There was a line of people about 75 deep camped out in the cold. While stopping to take a picture, the first guy in line started yelling at me and informing others what I was doing quite loudly. He was the first one in line, so I wasn’t worried he would come after me since it might mean losing the top spot.
All I could do was laugh at them for being slaves to consumerism.